UTUTIN NA BOYFRIEND

Ututin na boyfriend

Binibisita ng boyfriend ang kanyang girlfriend. Kumain sila at umupo sa salas.
Marami ang nakain ng bf at kailangan niyang maglabas ng masamang hangin. Ngunit nahihiya siya sa gf niya. Pinigil ng bf ang pag-utot, pero hindi niya na ito nakaya.
PPOOOOOTTTTT!!!!!
Huminto ang bf sa paggalaw. Hiyang0-hiya siya at pulang pula ang mukha. Tiningnan niya ang gf niya.
Walang siya ang gf, pero biglang tinawag ang aso na nasa ilalim ng upuan ng bf.
"Rex, umalis ka nga dyan!"
Pero walang kilos ang aso. Nakahinga ng maluwag ang bf at inisip - "Hay salamat, akala niya yung aso ang umutot!"
Nag-chat sila, ngunit nakaraan ang ilang sandali ay napapa-utot m okuli ang bf dahil talagang ang dami niyang kinain. Hindi niya ulit ito napigilan.
PPPOOOOOOTTTTT!!!!
Kinabahan ulit ang bf at namula. Muling sinabi ng gf, "Rex, ano ka ba? Umalis ka dyan sabi eh!"
Wala paring kibo ang aso. "Hay salamat sa aso," isip ng bf, "Akala niya ulit yung aso ang umutot."
Nag-chat ulit sila, pero napapa-utot ulit ang bf at hindi niya ito napigilan.
PPPPOOOOOOOOTTTTTTTT!!!!!!
Tumayo ang gf "Rex! Umalis ka dyan baka mataihan ka!!!!"

Ang Kawawang Cowboy

Ako ang kawawang cowboy
Ang bubble gum ko'y tsampoy
Ang pananghalian ko ay laging kamoteng kahoy

Ang ate ko at ang kuya
Ang nanay, tatay, at lola, ang buong pamilya
Silang lahat ay hindi cowboy
Ako'y nag-iisang palaboy
Ang aking kabayong dala may butones pa

Ang kawawang cowboy
(Kawawang cowboy)
May baril walang bala
May bulsa wala namang pera
Ako nga ang cowboy
(Kawawang cowboy)
Palaging nag-iisa
Ang kabayo ay walang paa
Ang aking brief ay butas pa

Ako ang kawawang cowboy
Ang bubble gum ko'y tsampoy
Ang pananghalian ko ay laging kamoteng kahoy

Ang ate ko at ang kuya
Ang nanay, tatay, at lola, ang buong pamilya
Silang lahat ay hindi cowboy
Ako'y nag-iisang palaboy
Ang aking kabayong dala may butones pa

Ang kawawang cowboy
(Kawawang cowboy)
May baril walang bala
May bulsa wala namang pera
Ako nga ang cowboy
(Kawawang cowboy)
Palaging nag-iisa
Ang kabayo ay walang paa
Ang aking brief ay butas pa

Ang kawawang cowboy
(Kawawang cowboy)
May baril walang bala
May bulsa wala namang pera...

Ecclesiastico 4:1-10

Ecclesiastico 4: 1-10

1 Anak, huwag mong aalisan ng ikabubuhay ang mahihirap
at huwag mong paghihintayin ang nangangailangan.

2 Huwag mong dudustain ang nagugutom,
at huwag mong gagalitin ang taong nasa mahigpit na pangangailangan.

3 Huwag mong dadagdagan ng suliranin ang taong masama ang loob,
at huwag mong ipagpaliban ang pagtulong sa maralita.

4 Huwag mong tatanggihan ang hiling ng nasa kasawian;
huwag mong tatalikuran ang taong dukha.

5 Huwag mong iiwasan ang nangangailangan;
huwag mo siyang bibigyan ng dahilang sumpain ka.

6 Kung sumpain ka niya sa gitna ng mapait niyang karanasan,
diringgin ng Maykapal ang kanyang dalangin.

7 Sikapin mong kalugdan ka ng lipunan;
igalang mo ang mga may kapangyarihan.

8 Pakinggan mo ang daing ng maralita;
sagutin mo siya nang banayad at payapa.

9 Iligtas mo ang naaapi sa kamay ng mang-aapi,
at magpakatatag ka kapag ikaw ay humahatol.

10 Maging isa kang ama sa mga ulila;
bigyan mo ang mga biyuda ng tulong na hindi na maidulot ng yumaong asawa;
aariin kang anak ng Kataas-taasang Diyos
at iibigin ka niya nang higit pa sa pag-ibig ng isang ina.

Ecclesiastico 1:1-21

Ecclesiastico 1: 1-30

Papuri sa Karunungan

1 Mula sa Panginoon ang lahat ng karunungan,
at iyon ay taglay niya magpakailanman.

2 Sino ang makakabilang ng buhangin sa dagat, o ng patak ng ulan,
o ng mga araw, o sa panahong walang pasimula at walang katapusan?

3 Sino ang makakasukat sa taas ng langit, o sa lawak ng lupa?
Sino ang makakaarok sa karagatan
at sino ang makakasaliksik sa Karunungan?

4-5 Bago pa likhain ang alinmang nilalang, nalikha na ang Karunungan,
at ang tunay na pagkaunawa, bago pa nagsimula ang mga panahon. a

6-7 Kanino ipinahayag ang simula ng Karunungan,
at sinong nakakaalam ng kanyang pamamaraan? b

8 Iisa lamang ang talagang marunong;
dapat tayong gumalang na may paghanga sa harap ng kanyang luklukan.

9 Ang Panginoon ang lumikha ng Karunungan,
kinilala niya ang kahalagahan nito
at ibinuhos niya ito sa lahat ng kanyang nilalang.

10 Binahaginan niya ng Karunungan ang lahat ng tao,
ngunit higit na masagana ang kaloob niya sa mga umiibig sa kanya. c

11 Kung may paggalang ka sa Panginoon,
magkakamit ka ng karangalan at kasiyahan,
mapuputungan ka ng tuwa at kagalakan.

12 Ang magparangal sa Panginoon ay nagdudulot ng kaligayahan at tuwa,
nagkakaloob ng buhay na mahaba at maligaya. d

13 Ang may paggalang sa Panginoon ay sasagana sa bandang huli;
pagpapalain siya sa oras ng kamatayan.

14 Ang paggalang sa Panginoon ay simula ng tunay na Karunungan;
sa sinapupunan pa ng ina'y kasama na siya ng mga tapat.

15 Nanirahan siya e sa gitna ng mga tao mula pa noong una
at magtitiwala sa kanya ang mga susunod na salinlahi.

16 Ang may paggalang sa Panginoon
ay siyang nagkakamit ng pinakamataas na Karunungan;
mag-uumapaw sa kanila ang kanyang masaganang bunga,

17 pinasasagana niya sa mabubuting bagay ang kanilang tahanan,
pinupuno niya ng masaganang ani ang kanilang f mga kamalig.

18 Ang paggalang sa Panginoon ay magandang bulaklak ng Karunungan,
na nagdudulot ng kapayapaan at kalusugan. g

19 Namamahagi siya ng kaalaman at ganap na pagkaunawa;
ang nagpapahalaga sa kanya
ay kanyang pinaparangalan at pinagiging tanyag.

20-21 Ang paggalang sa Panginoon ay siyang ugat ng Karunungan,
at ang mga sanga naman nito ay mahabang buhay

SIT STILL AND LISTEN

SIT STILL AND LISTEN

God is more likely to speak to you with a gentle whisper than

with a loud voice.

      Prayer isn't talking to God. Prayer is really talking

with God. It is a conversation between you and Him, it is a

dialogue where you each take turns talking as well as listening.

              Most of our prayers include a lot of our own talking, but

they usually lack the important aspect of listening. Of course,

we don't mean to suggest  that you are going to hear a celestial

voice booming in heavens like the sound of the thunder. We

don't even think that you'll hear an amplified voice like God

speaking through a megaphone. That is not how He works.

God usually speaks in quietness. You hear him, not audibly

with your ears, but internally in your heart and soul.

        The Holy Spirit is God's voice inside you. He wants

to speak to you, but you need to be quiet for a few moments so

                              you can hear Him.

                                                              _________________

"Be silent, and know that I am God"

PSALM 46:10

Shopee

KEEP A BALANCED PERSPECTIVE

KEEP A BALANCED PERSPECTIVE

The more you look up to God,

the less you will look down on people.

Have you ever noticed  how poorly people treat each

other? We've all been there. We've all said something dis-

paraging about another driver who cut us off in traffic. We've

all read an article about some unfortunate soul and said, "He

                                got what he deserved."

                                     Why are we so quick to look down on other people?

                               Is it because there's no other way to make ourselves feel

                               better? that can be it, because when it comes to others, the 

                               only way to improve our lives is to help them.

                                      No, we think it has more to do with God. The less

                               time we spend learning to know God and what He wants us

                              to do, the more time we have to criticize others. On the other

                              hand, the more we invite God into the details of our lives,

                               the more likely we will be to encourage and lift up other

                               people rather than tear them down.

                                                                 ________________

                                                                  

Live s life filled with love for others,

following the example of Christ.

                                                                  EPHESIANS 5:2

TWO KINDS OF ANGER

TWO KINDS OF ANGER

If you lose your temper, you've lost.

There are two kinds of anger. There is "righteous"

anger that comes out of a righteous response to sin. This is the

kind of anger that Jesus displayed when He chased the money

changers out of the Temple (Mark 11:15-17). You might ex-

press this type of anger,too. You can express this emotion and 

still have God in control of your life. In fact, it is the  Holy

Spirit inside you that reacts  and controls your responses.

The second kind of anger controls you. You lose your

temper. You say or do something you later regret, Don't try to

give God credit for this type of anger. He doesn't have any-

thing to do with it (and He doesn't want you to either). This

is the kind of anger that the Bible warns against because it can

                                  take over control of your life.

Only God should have control of your life. Make sure

that your temper is not pushing Him out of His rightful place.

_____________________

Don't be quick tempered,

for anger is the friend of fools.

ECCLESIASTES 7:9

SEEK THIS FIRST

SEEK THIS FIRST

Next time you write your priorities,

make sure you put God at the top.

Whenever you set goals for yourself, it's important

to prioritize them. Decide which ones are most important,

and do these first. Too often we waste our time on lower shelf,

easy to attain goals when we should be striving for the goals

on the top shelf, even if they are harder to reach.

As you get to know God better, you will find that He

will ask you to operate at a higher level of living. He wants

you to reach for the top shelf. This has nothing to do with

moving to the mountains or getting a promotion at work. What

it means is that you shouldn't worry about your short term,

personal needs ( they're important, but don't let them consume

you). Trust God to provide for the everyday stuff, and then

make God and His kingdom which He is building in this

world through, the hearts of those who follow Him your

                                     highest priority.

                                                            ___________________

He will give you all you need from day to day,

if you live for him and make the Kingdom of God

your primary concern.

MATTHEW 6:33

ARE YOU GOD'S " FAIR-WEATHER" FRIEND?

ARE YOU GOD'S " FAIR-WEATHER " FRIEND?

God's unconditional love for us

should be our motivation to love Him.

             Nobody likes a fair-weather friend. You know, those

people who hang around only when things are going well, You

                                   realize that their companionship and loyalty are merely an illus-

                                   ion if they bolt as soon as times get tough. You wouldn't want

                                   "a friend" like that.

                                                Neither does God, but sadly, many of us treat Him that

                                   way. We give God our adoration and allegiance only when He

                                   fulfills our expectations. So, if things are going smoothly in our

                                   lives, we are glad to express our appreciation by being attentive 

                                   to Him. But when difficulties arise, we are quick to blame God.

                                   We want a God Who is going to make our lives easy, so if He

                                    won't give us what we want, then we don't want to waste our

                                    time on Him. 

                                                Aren't you glad that His love for us endures no matter

                                    how we treat Him? That is true love from a true friend, and that

                                    should be how we respond to Him.

                                                                    __________________

We know how much God loves us,

and we have put our trust in him.

1 JOHN 4:16

DO YOU WANT TO KNOW GOD'S WILL?

DO YOU WANT TO KNOW GOD'S WILL?

If you want to know God's will,

spend time with Him

                          One of the mysteries of life is the will of God. We 

                                      desperately want to know what God wants us to do, but we're

                                       not really sure how to find out. While it's true that we'll never

                                       know all of God's will (after all, He's God), we can know a lot

                                       of what He wants us to do by spending time with Him.

                                                        Think about it on a human level. The more you get to

                                        know someone, the more you know what that person is like,

                                        and the more you know the person likes, That's what God's

                                        will is all about--knowing what God is like and knowing what 

                                        He likes. So you could say that the only way to  really  know 

                                        God's will is to really know God. How do you do that?

                                        By reading the Bible, His personal message to you, and by

                                        talking with Him as often as you can.

                                                              ______________________

                                            

                                             Your word is a lamp for my feet and a light for my path

                                                                           PSALM 119:105 

AMBITION

AMBITION

If you want to have a great life for yourself,

then give it away to God.

              Ambition is natural. After all, you want a happy family,

                          friendship, financial security, and good health. In other words, you want

                          a great life. It's only natural to have such ambitions and to do everything

                          necessary to attain your goals, But should you be ambitious just because

                          it comes naturally?

                                               Jesus taught about the great irony of self-ambition. He said

                          you must lose your life in order to keep it. This paradox forces you to

                          choose which is more important your physical life or your eternal soul.

                          Jesus taught that gaining everything on earth --all the things that are sup-

                          posed to make you happy-- will still leave you emotionally bankrupt if

                          you don't have a spiritual relationship with God.

                                               God wants you to live with ambition and purpose, but He

                          doesn't want you focus to be self-centered and self-directed. Let God

                           be your priority. Let living in His Kingdom be your ambition.

                                                             _______________________

                                           "And how do you benefit if you gain the whole world

                                               but lose or forfeit your own soul in the process?"

                                                                      LUKE 9:25

                 

      

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IT'S OKAY TO FEEL SMALL

IT'S OKAY TO FEEL SMALL

When you begin to feel self-important,

remember how mighty and vast God is.

                                               The opposite of feeling insignificant is feeling self-important,

                    and we've got of that going around. Everybody wants to be king of the world.

                    There's only one problem with putting yourself  at the center of the universe:

                    You tend to push God out.

                                               We're all for feeling confident. There's nothing wrong with 

                     knowing who you are, as long as you know Whose you are. You aren't some

                     autonomous being in full control of your destiny. You belong to God,Who

                    designed and built you as surely as He set the moon and the stars in place.

                                               Knowing that, it seems a little silly to tell God, ''Thanks for 

                     getting the ball rolling, but I can handle it from here." Instead, we should be

                     thankful that our big God has taken our small lives and turned them into

                     something significant.

                                                            _______________________

                              When i look at the night sky and see the work of your fingers

                                            the moon and the stars you have set in place

                                            what are mortals that you should think of us,

                                             mere humans that you should care for us?

                                                                 PSALM 8:3-4

THE INSIGNIFICANCE OF INSIGNIFICANCE

THE INSIGNIFICANCE OF INSIGNIFICANCE

Whenever you feel insignificant,

remember how important you are in God.

                                                       It doesn't take much effort to feel insignificant.

             Another person--probably someone you know pretty well--

         makes a negative comment about you, or you fail to meet your

                                       own expectations, and soon you're feeling low.

                         Or you start comparing your mundane achievements

          to the people who make headlines for their great accomplish-

            ments--especially in your field--and it doesn't take long for you to

                believe that your work or your position doesn't count for much. You

                                       wonder if anybody really cares.

                      Okay, we've gone low enough! That's no place for 

        someone whom God loves and cares about more than can be 

         imagined. Your life has value and what you do has significance

                                        because you are important to God.

______________________

"Not even a sparrow, worth only half a penny,

can fall to the ground withoutbyour Father knowing it.

And the very hairs on your head are all numbered.

So don't be afraid, you are more valuable to him

than a whole flock of sparrows"

MATTHEW 10:29-31

LOOKING AT GOD INSTEAD OF YOUR CIRCUMSTANCES

LOOKING AT GOD INSTEAD OF YOUR CIRCUMSTANCES

If you look at your circumstances through God's eyes,

then your circumstances won't obscure your view of God

We make life a lot harder than it needs to be. This

happens whenever the circumstances in our lives discourage us.

When problems arise, and nothing goes right, the stress builds.

We become unhappy, discouraged, and discontented.

It is in those tough times that God seems distant.

But it doesn't have to be that way.Instead of trying to

see God through your circumstances, take the opposite

approach. Look at your circumstances as insurmountable.

He's not intimidated or discouraged by them. Since they

aren't problems for Him, they shouldn't be for you.

The next time you find yourself looking down in

despair, lift your head and start looking up. Stop worrying

about your obstacles, and start thinking about 

the God Who can help you overcome them.

_______________________

For I can do everything with the help of Christ

who gives me the strenght I need

PHILIPPIANS 4:13

Keeping God in the Small Stuff (Devotions for Every Day)

 Be Content

          Contentment begins when comparisons ends

It is impossible to weigh your contentment on a scale of stuff. If stuff is your  measurement,

you will never have enough, because there will always be some one who has more stuff than you do.

      You will never be content  

Neither will you be content if you are proud of the fact that you dont have a lot of stuff,      

because there will always be someone who is more proud of their poverty than you are.

Stuff has nothing to do with contentment,because contentment is a matter of your heart,

not your wallet. Real contentment comes when you focus your heart and your mind on

 things above rather than things on Earth (Col.3:2)

____________________________________

I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything,

I have learned the secret of living in every situation.

PHILIPPIANS 4:12